The first total solar eclipse happened today. It arched over the United States and people everywhere purchased special eclipse glasses and stared up at the sun as the moon passed in front of it. Birds stopped chirping, the sky darkened, and the sun's warm rays cooled the heat by 15 degrees in my area. The metaphor for the Bride of Christ is startling. We have racial tensions in this country, hungry children, more churches than kids in foster care, marriages on the rocks, and what is the Church doing? Like the birds during the eclipse, the Church is silent. What does the Lord God want His Bride to do? Two passages give us some pretty strong clues: "He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God," Micah 6:8 and "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age," Matthew 28:19-20 I'm not talking about any particular denomination. I'm talking about the capital-C Church, Christ's Bride, the ones He will rapture up. Are we, as the redeemed and renewed, doing what these passages tell us to do? We are to act justly -- to show grace to others who are not deserving, as we were not deserving of Christ's grace. We are to love mercy -- to not act out in retribution but to cross lines and understand one another. We are to walk humbly with our Lord God. Instead of looking up at the sun, we are to bow to the Son. We are not equal to God, the Creator of the Universe, the Creator of man and woman. The Church needs to put God's Word above political correctness. We are to go -- to go out, armed with the Word of God and the Spirit of the Living God, and share the Gospel of Jesus Christ, who was born, lived, died and rose again to save humanity. We are to make disciples and teach the people we lead to Christ. So many times churches are great at the "going" -- going all the way across the country or world to share the Gospel, but when we leave on the church bus or on the airplane, who will disciple those new converts? Who will teach them the Word of God so they don't falter? Jesus told a parable about a farmer that sowed seed. If we look at this from a mission viewpoint, it's rather convicting. Matthew 13:5-8 states, "Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants. Still other seed fell on good soil, where it produced a crop — a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown." The new converts are seeds, and they can either land on rocky soil where they have some soil (therefore they listen and accept Jesus as Savior) but since they couldn't develop deep roots (discipleship), they "withered because they had no root." Other seeds fell among thorns -- people who believe but lacked believer friends and a support group necessary to strengthen their faith. For a church to do mission work in other parts of the world but neglect their backyard communities is shameful. If every Bible-believing, Jesus-preaching church in every town would do what Jesus commanded them to do in their own communities -- then supported other ministries, there would be a harvest of souls for the Lord. We must disciple souls as much as we try to win them for Jesus. Here's the thing: the moon came between the earth and the sun, blocking out the light. When that happened, the earth lost the blessing of the sunlight. It dropped 15 degrees instantly, birds stopped chirping, and it was strangely silent. If the Church doesn't speak up, and stand for the things of God, we allow non-Kingdom-building noise to come between our Christ-given Commission and the Son. When that happens, darkness settles in and God becomes strangely silent. The Church cannot afford to lose the blessing of the Son. The last few weeks has seen the United States divided on many issues. This nation cannot survive divided against itself. Yet, the Church has been silent on issues that are clear-cut in the Word of God: oneness in the Body no matter the color of skin; murder of innocent, pre-born children; praying for the persecuted Church all over the earth; sharing the changing Gospel of Jesus Christ to people deep in the LGBT sin lifestyle; and preparing for Christ's return by serving, in love, with the focus on sharing the story of salvation in Christ Jesus. Church, it's time to rise up! Wake up! Jesus is coming soon -- will He find you steadfast in your appointed jobs or asleep? Will He find you complacent? The Church cannot allow satan-made worldly divisions and distractions to eclipse her mission to share the Gospel and love others in Jesus' name. We cannot willingly surrender our God-given battlefield to be overtaken by satan's darkness -- especially when God gave us the armor, weapons, and His Holy Spirit to do what He commanded us to do. In Jesus' Name, Terrie Want subscriber-only encouragement and Bible studies? Click here for Near Your Altar's weekly letter. (c) 2017 Terrie McKee
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There are moments in a Christian’s life that stand out. Like signs on the side of the road that mark historic events that occurred at that place, these moments cause one to come to a decision about their faith in God: will it increase? Deepen? If a moment of question or tragedy causes someone to turn away from God, it must be questioned how close that person was to God at all. God doesn’t move; we do. If we turn our backs on the Lord, walk away from the faith that we once claimed as unshakeable, the question must be asked: were you worshiping the Lord God of heaven and earth, Creator of all; or you were worshiping your version of Him? If at any time you have uttered the words “Well, MY god wouldn’t do this or that…” you have been worshiping and serving an image, an idol – a god you have made up is no god at all. God is so big and multi-faceted that to experience all of Him is too much for us to comprehend. He is Who He is and Who He is does not contradict Who He says He is in the Bible, which is His inspired Word. He is Glory and Love and Mercy. He is Good. Moses only had a glimpse, a passing-by of God in His glory and his face was shining like the sun. If someone looked at God in all His awesomeness it would kill that person. It is too much – only when we are in His presence in heaven with resurrection bodies can we experience all of Him. As we mature in the Christian faith, through a steady diet of the Word, Christian fellowship, study and most of all, prayer, He reveals more of Himself to us – as much as He believes we can handle. There have been many moments in which I can put an “x” on a faith timeline and say here, this is a time and place in which my faith changed. It either deepened, strengthened, or God showed me a part of Him that I had never experienced before. When my abusive marriage ended, Jesus showed me that He is my Husband-Redeemer. He alone provides my needs. When my son was diagnosed with autism He showed me that He does not make mistakes – and gave me the ability to teach my abstract-minded boy about God in concrete terms, deepening my faith while growing Sam’s. When I sat alone on the beach during a faith retreat, praying to God and worshiping Him as the waves beat against the seashore, He showed me the same power that reins in the waves knows my name – even the correct spelling of it. The same God who makes earthquakes roar and rumble in the ocean, pushing up in the earth and forming a new island is the very same God who gently helps a Monarch butterfly break through its cocoon and spread its colorful wings. When I was weakened from a virus the night my cancer-stricken dad died at my house, it was the Lord God Who heard my desperate cry to stay my fever and weakness so I could help my mom, and there it was – instantly, no fever, no weakness. That night He showed me His healing mercy and grace even as He welcomed my dad into His arms. All these moments in time had one thing in common: God taught me something about Himself. He used these things for His glory. In August 2015, in prayer, God revealed to me that He was about to bless us. I shared this with my husband of eight years. The last time God told me this, we conceived our daughter. Having had a hysterectomy, we, like Jesus’ mother, wondered what God meant by this. Certainly the God who can conceive via a virgin can conceive via a 44 year old woman who had already birthed three kids. But a baby was not in order. God kept on revealing that a blessing was coming. Now, we often think of a blessing as something incredibly good, like a baby. Due to circumstances that were out of our control, a violent incident caused my husband to become permanently paralyzed from the waist down. Severe nerve pain is crippling, making him cry out. I’ve had to stop homeschooling our daughter due to the intense care he required. I had to stop writing for a while. The shooting devastated our family. But, in this time, God showed up the moment the gun was fired in his back and he fell on his nose, causing it to bleed profusely. Church family met us at the hospital and our entire church lifted us all in prayer. The prayers were tangible. God’s presence was tangible – we could almost feel His breath on our necks as He embraced us and held us up. Every prayer that was prayed was answered. The blessing was His presence. He showed us His presence and glory that was almost too much to bear. I’d sit on a bench outside the trauma ICU and just cry-pray: Lord, it’s too much, Your presence is so powerful, it’s so powerful, we are not worthy… At one point when his meds kicked in and the pain subsided enough for the tears to run down his cheeks without him screaming in pain, my husband told me, “Now I understand…looking at the pool of blood from my nose, now I understand…His body was broken and His blood was shed for us. It was real, it happened. He took the beating and the nails for us, willingly….now I understand…” and the pain took hold, sending him back into holding his hand up and yelling, “Praise Him in this storm! Praise Him!” Tears coursed down both our faces. When, at 4:30 a.m., a pain medicine cocktail was given to him that knocked him out for a couple of pain-managed hours, I prayer-walked….Oh Lord, the needs….ramp to get in the house…will he be able to work? Christmas, Lord…He won’t be able to roll on the carpet in our house…what will we do? Friends and family and total strangers heard about the incident. Funds poured into a GoFundMe site that was set up to meet our many needs. Our church told us to not worry about the house; several contracting companies had already heard about our story and had volunteered to do whatever was necessary to make our home accessible. God met each and every need we had through His Church. God used a terrible situation that satan meant for evil and used it to bring people closer to Him. He used it to show the world what the Church stood for instead of what it was against. God used a terrible incident to bless not only us, but others through the outpouring of love and support shown to us by our church family. God’s strength in this time of desperation fueled our faith and we were outspoken about it. People in the community were amazed. So were we. We were amazed that the Lord God of heaven would choose us to be His witnesses during this time. We are not worthy of the blessing that He bestowed upon us to be His vessels, yet, here we are, covered in grace and the power of the blood of the Lamb. Oh, but the needs are still great. We’re dealing with the permanent aspect of this which is emotionally traumatizing. We’re dealing with the financial stress that huge medical bills are causing. We’re dealing with maintaining a home, helping our kindergartner with her reading as she is in public school and helping our 18 year old son find direction in his life. We’re dealing with my many panic attacks both seen and unseen. We’re dealing with him driving now and going to work, coaching t-ball….life did not stop or slow down even though my husband’s legs no longer work. Most of all, we’re so beyond grateful to God – not only for the blessings of hardwood laminate throughout the house or a shower room that is incredible, or the ramps and deck that are mind-blowing and fully accessible, but in His presence and power. We’re so thankful that He works through His children. We’re so thankful for the GoFundMe account that has been used for the house rehab and the car with hand controls. Having been in this unthinkable journey in which all our lives were changed the instant that gun was fired, we realize the blessing God was telling us about was Himself. He was about to show us His power, presence and peace in ways we could not fathom them before. But going through this journey, we cannot understand how people can do this, go through similar tragedies, without Him. Without Christ. We couldn’t do it. People have told us many times that we are so strong. I disagree. We are weak. We are puny and small and nothing without Jesus who lives in and through us. We are strong not because of our own faith, but because of Jesus. Jesus’ empty tomb means that He has victory over death and evil. What satan meant for harm, Jesus has used to glorify Himself. He is victor. He is sovereign. UPDATE: Greg continues to have no feeling below his waist. His paraplegia is permanent, due to this senseless act of sin and aggression. However, God in His grace has allowed Greg to exercise by playing wheelchair basketball, which is amazing (but oh,my.goodness. is it aggressive!). In the past three weeks, he has learned how to do his nightly self-care by himself with transfers and everything. All four of our children are now living with us (which has created more financial issues) but we're managing. God provides and we trust Him. Jacob did indeed get a replacement truck after his was totaled last year, but the engine blew in the new-to-him truck. Maybe we should get him a mule and cart instead. Beloved: no matter what you're going through, God hears and sees your tears. He loves you. I think that the shooting and Greg's paralysis happened for a reason, and that reason could very well be this: if you are encouraged by our story, that's reason enough. Many people from around the world have asked how they can pray for us. As a believer in the power of specific prayer, here are the current needs that we humbly ask you to lift to the throne of heaven. We know God hears them.
I constantly hear of people lifting us in prayer -- and for that I am so very grateful. Thank you for lifting us up to our Mighty Savior. God is so very good. He has shown His tenderness and compassion even as he has shown us His power and might. To God be the glory. Always. In His Name, Terrie © 2017 Terrie McKee In the excitement of new book bags, the flurry of buying new notebooks, and trying on new school clothes, let's not forget the most important school supply of all: prayer for our children. Public school, private school, Christian school, homeschool -- it doesn't matter -- kids today feel an enormous amount of pressure. The desire to make friends, fit in, do well on tests, do well on the SAT and ACT, get into their first pick of college, they need prayer. Even my little second grader feels the pressure -- if not in the classroom, then certainly on the playground. As we stock up on folders, pencils, and erasers, let's look at five ways in which we can lift children in prayer as they start another school year -- and make a concerted effort to continue praying for them. Protection Pray first and foremost for protection. Kids need to be surrounded by prayer to protect them from false doctrine -- it doesn't matter what kind of school they attend. Christian schools are not immune to false doctrine -- and not all kids who go to Christian schools are, in fact, followers of Christ. Peer pressure is alive and well in all schools. Having said that, if you choose to send your child to public school, make sure they know Whose they are. Ensure they are grounded in the faith at home and in a Bible-believing church, Sunday School class, and youth group. They cannot be the Light of Christ in public school if their bulb is burned out, or non-existent. If you homeschool your child, be sure they also know why you chose that route, so they can answer people who will surely ask why they aren't "in school." People don't understand that a trip to the grocery store between the hours of 8 a.m. - 2 p.m. can be just as instructional as sitting in a classroom. Also pray that God would protect your child from bullying (either being the target or being the aggressor). Bullying is a scourge in schools and it exists on playgrounds, in classrooms, hallways, on social media, and via texting. Parents, be extremely cautious in getting middle schoolers smart phones. Between ready access to pornography, the ability to cheat on tests, bullying, and distracting games, they're just not worth it. Nothing wrong with a flip phone! For high schoolers, have set guidelines in place. Know your child's passwords for every social media account and app. Befriend them on everything. You want to see what they're into? Befriend their friends as well. Pray for protection from false friends who will lead them down paths of destruction. Concentration Pray that your child will concentrate on school and homework. Ask teachers for testing schedules so you can pray for your child on those days. Praying for your kid is as important as ensuring they rest well the night before and eat a good breakfast the day of the test. Homeschoolers, pray concentration over your children too. Sometimes home life can be incredibly distracting -- between chores, siblings, the temptations of television and toys -- they need prayer too. Invest in some good books on CD on topics they are learning about, and if you have to run errands, listen to that book-on-CD. Some vehicles have DVD players in them -- why not borrow appropriate learning DVDs from the library and run them in the car as you travel? Sometimes, kids will concentrate more on instructional audio disks or movies if they're a captive audience, so to speak. Friends Pray that the Holy Spirit would guide them in making friends. This goes back to protection -- know their friends and their friends' parents. Befriend the parents on social media and ask for phone numbers. Have the parents and kids over for dinner. Be hospitable to your child's friends -- be the house where everyone wants to hang out. If that means having a video game system, pool table, or pool -- so be it. If that means having make-your-own pizza night, go for it. In order to be the Light of Christ for our kids, we have to be willing to shine to their friends, too. Faith I homeschooled my little girl for the first part of her kindergarten year, then my husband was shot and paralyzed. With his care, it just became too much. So with much prayer, we made the decision to send her to public school. The very first day, she walked in her classroom and shared Jesus (at five years old!) with her table-mates. She would pray over her lunch. It didn't matter that corporate prayer wasn't allowed -- she was praying individually. It doesn't matter what kind of school we send our kids too -- we need to pray that they would grow in Christ. Luke 2:52 states, "...and Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man." We need to pray too that kids would grow in the wisdom of God and in His favor. We need to pray that our children would grow to have a reputation with their peers and teachers of being kind and showing others the Holy Spirit within them. Listen, parents -- don't be afraid to lead your child to Christ. If they can understand 4 + 4 = 8 and that North America is a continent, then they can understand that Jesus, the Son of God, lived. They can understand that He can save them, and they can accept Him as their Savior. They understand a lot more than we give them credit for -- because they do so without question, and with the faith of a child. Teachers Pray for their teachers. Oh, this is so important. Teachers aren't paid well enough at all in this country and face a mountain of work. Pray for them. Send them encouraging notes and emails. Listen: buy something on their wishlist. If they need paper, buy it. Right now stores have reams of paper for under $3.00. Stock up for yourself and get a couple reams for the teacher. If you have a teacher supply store in your town, get them a $20 gift card for the start of school. While you're at it, get them a coffee house gift card too. You're not buying your kid good grades -- you're showing your child's teacher you appreciate them. If you're a pastor and you have homeshooling families in your church -- recognize them. Offer empty Sunday School classrooms as a nice change of scenery to them, or the gym for once-a-week physical education classes. Lastly, I've made a refrigerator-friendly PDF of these different ways to pray for your child throughout the school year, and it's available when you subscribe to Near Your Altar's emailed subscriber letter. To subscribe, just click here. I just email once a week, so I'm not flooding your in-box, but I do offer subscriber-only freebies and encouragement. Happy School Year! May it be filled with the peace and presence of Christ! Love in Him, Terrie (C) 2017 Terrie Bentley McKee When my husband was shot in November 2015, people would comment on social media, both on my accounts and in news reports that they were praying for us. We experienced the peace that intercessory prayer provides. We also encountered other people who commented, “Be strong! It’s in the Bible – God doesn’t gives us anymore than we can handle!” What?! So this well-meaning but extraordinarily unbiblical platitude declared that we could handle a bullet still encased in his vertebrae? Searing nerve pain? Paraplegia? Could we handle 9/11? Spousal abuse? This comment suggests God the Father is sitting on His throne, saying, “I’ll give Terrie six different types of genetic migraines that mimic strokes and send her to the hospital – she can handle it.” Or, “I’ll give that man cancer – he’s strong, he can handle it.” Or, “That young woman in her seventh month of pregnancy – she can handle a stillbirth.” We need to stop saying God doesn’t give us anymore than we can handle. This common twisting of Scripture makes us little gods, doesn’t it? As though the handling of life is solely on our shoulders. We are not God. How dare we try to comfort one another by inferring that we don’t need Christ in the lowest points of our lives. The verse that this comment butchers comes from 1 Corinthians 10:13. Paul wrote, “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.” This verse is talking about temptation – not trials. This verse says that when we are tempted, Christ is the way out. When we are led to sin, Christ gives us the Holy Spirit to sear our conscious and lead us from unrighteousness. Right after I accepted Christ as my Savior at 12 years old, I thought that temptation meant chocolate cake. That chocolate cake in the school lunch line was tempting me to eat it. Now, I know temptation still looks a lot like that chocolate cake: irresistible, enticing, it’s only temporary. But any temptation that leads you away from God is not worth it, much like armchair theologians who try to figure out what the Word of God means without research or study – they lead others away from God and what the Bible means. It is terrible when tragedy strikes. Sometimes it’s just enough to sit and hug someone going through unimaginable grief instead of serving up half-baked, unbiblical yapping just to be able to say something to help the grieving one feel better. Sometimes you can't make someone feel better and you're not supposed to -- you just need to be there. When Greg was in the hospital after the shooting, and people would say to me, “God won’t ever give you more than you can handle,” I knew what they were saying had no scriptural basis. I knew they did not know any better, and that makes me sad for them. But when someone tells that line to a nonbeliever, or a new Christian, or someone exploring Christ’s salvation, they are in effect telling them that God doesn’t care, and they don’t need Him. They are strong enough. That, my friends, is the talk of satan – not a follower of Christ. satan would like nothing more than Christians and non-believers think they don’t need Christ. I tell you, we have enough spiritual warfare in this world without adding to it because Christians don’t know the Word of God. When we acknowledge that we need Christ, and therefore surrender to Him and His will, here’s what happens: we know that whatever may happen to us, good or bad, we need Jesus to get us through that thing. If we believed that God never gave us anymore than we can handle, we would be highly tempted to believe we could do anything. It would be all about us. There’s a movement in the United States called “firewalking.” Like the name says, a bed of hot coals is prepared and people walk across this bed, which is between eight and 20 feet long, barefoot. In the article “Firewalking as Spiritual Transformation,” writer Dan Beckett (who has participated in five firewalks) wrote, “For many who have walked, there is immense satisfaction in having done something that the world tells you is impossible. In fact, many firewalking instructors have the walkers write out on a card, ‘I walk on fire. I can do anything I choose,’ along with the date and your signature.” This is a metaphor for today’s society. “I can do this; I can do anything.” This reinforces the idea that people don’t need Christ in their lives – they can walk on fire, they can do anything. God won’t give you anymore than you can handle – you can handle anything. I don’t know about you, but I can’t handle everything. When my little girl asks me, “So when will Daddy walk again?” I can’t handle that. When I try to write the manuscript for the book I’m writing on the shooting and I have to put myself back in a time that I’d love to forget, I can’t handle that. I need Jesus. I need Jesus to help me parent my adult son with autism. I need Jesus to give me the words to comfort my teenage daughter. I need Jesus. Listen: when we know we need Jesus, whatever happens will bring Him glory and not us. Isn’t that the point of a Christian life? To bring Him glory? Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 12:7b-10, “I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” When we declare our weaknesses, Christ can use those. If God did not give us weaknesses, it would remove the source of strength we have in Christ Jesus. Think about that. When we are weak, and know we are weak and need Him, He will meet that need. We are therefore strong in Him. Not in ourselves. Philippians 4:12-13 states, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” Being content in any and every situation comes out of relying on Christ for strength, not ourselves. When my husband was crying out in pain the night of the shooting, but with His hand raised and praising the Name because he was alive – that’s contentment. That is strength that only Christ can give at the exact moment it’s needed. When we do that – surrender to Christ in the moment of need and rely on Him for strength and miracles – He gets the glory. Not us. Giving God the glory is worship, as it is mentioned in Revelation 14:7, “He said in a loud voice, “Fear God and give him glory, because the hour of his judgment has come. Worship him who made the heavens, the earth, the sea and the springs of water.'" Giving ourselves glory takes it away from God. Friends, we need to stop saying that He only gives us what we can handle, therefore placing God’s glory upon us. Let’s look at Jeremiah 13:16 – “Give glory to the Lord your God before he brings the darkness, before your feet stumble on the darkening hills. You hope for light, but he will turn it to utter darkness and change it to deep gloom.” I love what Revelation 4:10-11 says, “…The twenty-four elders fall down before him who sits on the throne and worship him who lives for ever and ever. They lay their crowns before the throne and say: “You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being.” Instead of handling everything on my own, I would much rather lean on Christ and see what He will do with the stuff of my life. I long to take any crowns won on His behalf and place them at His feet. Isn’t that what we’re to do – bring Him glory? How can we do that if we handle everything ourselves? In Christ, Terrie © 2017 Terrie McKee Want to buy your children toys that help building faith in Jesus Christ? Here’s a list of 7 fun toys that help do just that! Please note these are all affiliate links, which help support my family. When you use these links to buy these special gifts for your child, you not only give the gift of fun and faith, but you also put food on my table and help me provide encouraging Christian posts through this blog. I thank you. Melissa & Doug Days of Creation Stacking and Nesting Blocks With Convenient Rope-Handled Storage Box Galilee Boat 15 Piece Playset by BibleToys BibleToys Noah's Ark 18 Piece Playset with Noah, 14 Animals and Floating Ark Fisher-Price Little People Noah's Ark Playset Fisher-Price Little People A Christmas Story Worship for Teens CD Operation: Noah's Ark Edition Board Game I pray that you and your children, no matter the age, will grow in Christ Jesus. Have fun! In Christ, Terrie © 2017 Terrie McKee I recently walked with my daughter down the aisle of a discount store toy department – the toys that are available now for young ones like my seven-year-old little girl are appalling. Either they are downright scary looking, or the dolls have so much makeup on them in short, short dresses that I wonder what message is being sent. One may say – they’re just toys. There’s no message. Listen, friend – there’s a message in everything. That’s called marketing. You just have to do a search online about hidden messages in children’s toys to be thoroughly creeped out. They are even reports about subliminal and even outright messages on children’s toys promoting suicide, Islam, gender fluidity, homosexuality, and other messages satan has created to lure children (and adults) away from Christ and to hell. As Christian parents, we need to remember that our homes are our first mission field. Matthew 19:14 states, “Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” If it was important to Jesus for children to know Him, then it should be important to us that nothing – not even toys – hinder that. So how can we ensure that the toys we allow our children to play with are acceptable? First off, there is nothing wrong with the old-fashioned method of going outside. If you can, build a tree house or a playhouse. Put weather-resistant décor on it and allow the kids’ imaginations to run with it. So many toys today require batteries; so few are powered by imaginations. Many toys have their own script of how the child is to play with it. I have a young nephew who loves garbage trucks. He thinks they’re fascinating. What’s not to like, in the mind of a five-year-old? The arm comes down, picks up the garbage can, swings up, and dumps out all the trash. Bang bang bang, the arm shakes the can to make sure everything is out, then it puts it back on the ground. That’s good entertainment right there. Last Christmas I looked all over the place for a red garbage truck. That’s what he wanted. He had a couple other garbage trucks that were blue or green, and even a recycling truck, but he wanted one in red. Do you know how hard it is, in this environmentally-conscious society where everything has to be green to find a red garbage truck? I found one, finally – but it didn’t take batteries or anything. He zooms that thing around all the time, powered by Rylan. God gave us imaginations to dream the impossible. He gave us the intelligence to make those dreams realities. Toys can also be used to encourage children in the walk of faith in Jesus Christ. They can illustrate, via play with a child’s parents, the stories of the Bible. When my daughter Laura was just a toddler, she was given a Noah’s Ark playset. She and I, or her Daddy, would play with her with it together. Noah cleaned out the animal stalls while the lion stood guard on deck. Giraffes would stick their necks out the windows. She’d line up all the animals and have Noah take roll as each animal came on board. It was great fun – for her and us. We got to see her imagination just run with the thought of all these animals on this boat. Then, that night, we opened her storybook Bible to the story of Noah’s Ark. The look on her face! Suddenly, it wasn’t a toy anymore, but a way to share the Word of God with our child. Click here for a list of toys to build kids' faith I have a Nativity set that’s been in my family for years. Growing up, I rearranged the plastic figures and now, at Christmas, my daughter does the same thing. The shepherds go on the left this week; the Wise Men can come up from the south today – they took a detour. Now that Laura’s a little older, though, she takes great care with the Nativity. She will line up the figures and have them talk with one another about what’s going on. She’s even had a Wise Man change the Baby Jesus’ diaper before! Her imagination is incredible. Like the Noah’s Ark, though, it has a lot to do with my husband and I talking with her about each of the figures, finding the correlating Bible story, and teaching her. If we don’t actively teach our children about faith in our Lord, the world will teach them about who He is not – or about things that are so contrary to the Christian faith that their belief system will be a continuous uphill climb. Listen: satan has put scales on people’s eyes, even when it comes to the innocent among us – our children. Those scales make us blind to what he is actually doing – and that is substituting faith in Jesus Christ, the only One who gives real Hope and Salvation, for things that doom people to hell. It’s to the point now that even people who grew up in the church cannot articulate what they believe. Listen to what the Word of God says in this incredible verse from 2 Corinthians 4:4. “The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel that displays the glory of Christ, who is the image of God.” When one is blind, you can only see darkness. Intentionally, satan has used kids’ toys, movies, television shows, books, and games to blind children – and because they’re “just kids’ stuff,” we let it happen. Do we want our children to be able to see the Light of the Gospel that displays the glory of Christ? Do we want our kids to be able to look at a rainbow after a summer rain shower and think of God’s promise, or something else? Let the children be children. Let them play. Let them go outside and climb a tree. Take them to the playground, leaving your smartphone in your pocket. Play with them. Read to them. 1 Peter 5:8 states, “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” Parents, we need to be the ones, when it comes to our kids, to be alert when it comes to the things we allow in our homes. Tenacious, satan will not give up. We have to suit up in the Armor of God and not give up either. They’re not just toys. They’re part of the battlefield for your child’s soul. Yes, that sounds awfully melodramatic. But, if you think I’m kidding, please take a look at these videos: http://www.cbs8.com/story/27368268/disturbing-image-hidden-in-dollar-store-toy https://vigilantcitizen.com/vigilantreport/monster-high-a-doll-line-introducing-children-to-the-illuminati-agenda/ https://www.christiancentury.org/blogs/archive/2012-12/no-elf-our-shelf When the Disney/Pixar movie “Toy Story 3” came out, there was an article published on CNN (that originally ran on a website called ‘The Frisky’) with the headline “Sexism and stereotypes in 'Toy Story 3?'” In the article, the author Kelli Bender mentions a Ms. Magazine writer, Natalie Wilson, who had issues with the movie, claiming it was sexist and other things. Bender quotes the Ms. Magazine article: “She writes that the mother in the movie is depicted as ‘nagging,’ while Barbie is shown as ‘over emotional’ and ‘hyper-feminine.’ Her packaged partner in crime, Ken, is painted as a ‘closeted gay fashionista’ who is constantly teased. Wilson worries that depictions like this will teach children, especially boys, that being female or homosexual is wrong -- or at least something to laugh at.” “Toy Story 3” aside for a moment, let’s concentrate on what the Ms. Magazine writer Natalie Wilson said about it: “Depictions like this will teach children, especially boys, that being female or homosexual is wrong....” Did you get that? A mainstream, liberal magazine asserts that a movie (which does have its share of questionable things, yes) will teach children that homosexuality is wrong. If we, as Christian parents, don’t teach our children about God and what is right in His eyes, the world will teach them about what is not right in His eyes. It’s not child’s play anymore. In Christ, Terrie © 2017 Terrie McKee This post may contain affiliate or other links to products. These links help provide for this website as well as my family. To read my disclosure policy, please click here. When I think about all my life is encompassing right now, I stress out just thinking about it. Life is just hard. It’s overwhelming. My oldest, in his early twenties, has autism and absolutely no filter on his mouth. My youngest, in the single digits, also has no filter on her mouth. The two in-between the oldest and youngest work and have lives to lead. My husband is paraplegic – that leaves the large majority of the household upon my shoulders. Even delegating some of it to my son with autism is not without challenges. Constantly having to go back and check to see if the dishwasher was unloaded correctly, with silverware in the silverware drawer instead of dishes in the drawer, is tiring. Fielding 40 questions a day about generators, gears, steam trains – it’s all so very draining. Having a young adult with autism is a monumental weight to carry. There are a few things I do, though, to help manage the stress in my life – for both my mental and physical health. After all, if I’m not well, my family and household suffer along with me. Praying the Scriptures Praying is the most important tool in the stress management toolbox. There’s nothing like pouring my soul out to Jesus in a moment of need. Praying the Scriptures back to Lord Jesus, though, solidifies the place the Bible has in my faith life. That act reminds me of God’s sovereignty, His Kingship, and the role He has in my life. He doesn’t need to be reminded of that – but praying Scripture back to Him gives a deeper meaning to my worship of Him. For example, the first night I spent on a mission trip in Zambia, Africa, I took my Bible, a flashlight, and my towel outside and sat on the ground – just me and the Lord Jesus, under millions of stars in the African sky. Without the air pollution in the U.S., I could actually see the milky substance of the Milky Way. The sky was polka-dotted with millions and millions of stars – and I was overcome with the power, majesty and Awesomeness of the Creator. In worship I focused the flashlight upon Psalm 108 and prayed it back to my Lord. I still get goosebumps from that experience. It’s like God gave us His Word to show us what to pray in worship back to Him. One wonderful book I’ve used in the past to do this, beside my Bible, is Beth Moore’s Praying God's Word: Breaking Free from Spiritual Strongholds [aff link!]. This book takes different passages from the Bible, changes the wording a little to make them into prayers, and categorizes them depending upon the need or difficulty. It is a great tool in your faith toolbox to use. Praying and using the Scriptures in prayer helps manage my stress levels as they make me focus on Christ instead of my troubles. Another tool I use is simple breathing. Breathing When I was giving birth to my oldest child, I used breathing to control my anxiety and the pains of labor. I use breathing even today to manage anxiety and the pains of life. Breathing slowly and deeply in your nose, then slowly exhaling out of your mouth, brings much-needed oxygen into your lungs and body. An article on Breathing.com states that breathing through your nose like this is the optimum way to breathe; in fact, breathing only using your mouth for inhalation and exhalation can lead to elevated “blood pressure and heart rate and worsens asthma, allergies…and deprives your heart, brain and other organs of oxygenation.” In other words, breathing using just your mouth and not a nose-inhalation/mouth-exhalation can increase blood pressure and heart rate, which increases anxiety and stress. It’s amazing what just simply breathing correctly can do to your stress levels. Especially in difficult times, you must remind yourself to breathe slowly and correctly. Essential Oils I have recently discovered the amazing benefits of essential oils. Full disclaimer here: I am an independent distributor for Young Living essential oils [an a.m.a.z.i.n.g. affiliate link!] ; I would not use them if they did not have some benefit to me. I used to buy lavender essential oil just as an addition to my bathwater for relaxation. Now that I’m aware of so many more oils and their benefits, it’s just amazing how they benefit me and my family (I still use lavender in my bath!). My seven year old daughter tends to be on the hyper side. I’ve discovered that applying the essential oil “Peace and Calming” on her chest, wrists and behind her ears (a little dab on pulse points) helps her be calm enough to slow down and enjoy the day. It also helps with her social anxiety. As my husband is paraplegic, I mix a few different oils together, such as lavender, peppermint, frankincense, and a blend called “Trauma Life” and rub it on his paralyzed legs. He’s getting some muscle movement back, and is working on bending his right leg. Praise Jesus! I regularly diffuse “Stress Away” as it just melts normal, large-family stress down the tube. Since I’ve been a part of the Young Living family, I’ve found a community of people who go out of their way to help you with oil knowledge, assisting in team building if you went into the business side of it, and prayer! Oh the prayers sent up on my behalf from my Young Living teammates have been sweet aromas to the Lord, and we can feel them. Talk about stress relief! If you want more info about how to get involved or buy Young Living products, click here. I’d love the opportunity to help you use essential oils to de-stress your life! Lists One of the biggest ways I manage stress is by making copious amounts of lists. In my phone I have a “Notes” app that I use regularly to make reminders for myself, my Christmas lists (Shhhhh….don’t tell my kids!), grocery lists, and even blogging ideas. Our brains can hold only so much sensory input. Something’s gotta give. So using lists to capture information so that we don’t have to remember it (although remembering where the list is – BONUS!) is a great way to eliminate stress in your life. It helps you organize your thoughts. In fact, this particular post started out as an idea that I put on a “Blogging Ideas” note in my phone. My son Sam, since he has autism and other fairly large medical challenges, takes a lot of prescription medications, as does my mother. I’ve created a list that I use to fill-in-the-blank to update their medications. So now, if he visits his grandparents or she goes to the hospital, their med lists go with them as another means of making sure everyone is on the same page with their care. To help you out, click here for a downloadable printable of a medication list. Subscribers to my email newsletter can also get a Christmas list printable, since it will soon be time to think about Christmas [and it's a huge de-stresser to start shopping early]. Click here to subscribe to my newsletter. Writing Ah, writing – sometimes it’s cheap therapy, sometimes it’s a curse, especially when you see misspelled words in memes, on menus, on billboards… writing can help distress your life by journaling and getting your innermost thoughts and feelings out of your head and onto paper. My mother and oldest daughter love to color adult coloring books. That brings them an immense amount of joy and release of tension. I haven’t been able to get into the journaling Bibles, because I use the margins in my Bible for notes, but that’s also a good tool to use. Basically, these five ways I manage stress help me self-care, so I can be the best wife and mother I can for my husband and four kids. We have such a crazy-busy life right now, and we need a little decompression. It is my prayer that you will try at least one of these methods, or more, and let me know how they work out for you. And if you are interested in trying the essential oils, just go to this page and we’ll chat! Love in Christ, Terrie © 2017 Terrie McKee I am a dedicated follower of Christ, a teacher of His Word, and an encourager of other Christian women; as a speaker and writer, I count myself in the ranks of an evangelist – I have successfully shared the Gospel in the United States, Africa, Russia, and even China, thanks to this blog’s reach on the Internet into that closed-door country. I am also divorced. I endured physical, emotional, psychological and sexual abuse – plus adulterous affairs – from my first husband because I valued the vows I had made 10 years earlier. As I was recovering from emergency surgery from when he had thrown me to the floor so hard it shattered my L4/L5 vertebrae and caused a concussion, I told him I wanted a divorce. Why? Because he asked me this: “You just need to choose, Terrie: either me, or Jesus.” I chose Jesus. When he left, there was no more contention, no more violence, my sons no longer cried out for him to stop hitting their mommy, and there was peace. The peace that passes all understanding – the peace that only Christ can give. Do I believe in divorce? No. Do I think it is an answer for every disagreement or because one is bored? No. Absolutely not. But it doesn’t matter what I believe. It does matter what the Word of God says. There are two implicit reasons the Bible allows for divorce. One is adultery; the other is when an unbelieving spouse abandons the marriage. Adultery “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery,” said Jesus in Matthew 19:9. While the goal is reconciliation, just as God has reconciled us to Him through the cross, if the spouse who is committing adultery continues to sin and not break off those adulterous relationships, that spouse has no interest in reconciliation. What does the Bible say about people who have no interest in reconciliation, in stopping the affairs or listening to repeated attempts at counseling or the Gospel message? Jesus said, “ If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, leave that home or town and shake the dust off your feet,” [Matthew 10:14]. My husband would see other women, hit me, threaten me – then bring home a bouquet of nearly-dead flowers from the grocery store clearance flowers, apologize, and say he was sorry. It wouldn’t happen again. But it did. It happened over and over again. I forgave him over and over again…but he treated forgiveness like a “get out of jail free” card instead of repenting of his behavior and not doing it again. Listen: forgiveness is so that we can move on. Repentance is for the sinner to come to a saving grace in Christ, to not sin any more. Forgiving someone who has wronged you should never make you a doormat for abuse. Abandonment The second biblical reason for divorce is abandonment. 1 Corinthians 7:15 states, “But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.” If a Christian is married to an unbeliever, and if the unbeliever abandons the marriage, we are to let him or her go. “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” states 2 Corinthians 6:14. Marriages between believers and unbelievers face immeasurable difficulties – yet, there is hope. Prayer does wonders, and there are many unbelieving spouses who have been prayed for and led to salvation in Jesus because of a faithful spouse. But when that unbeliever is adamant about ridiculing the faith of the Christian spouse, demanding a choice is made between Jesus and the unbeliever – we are to choose Christ. Luke 14:26 states, “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters — yes, even their own life — such a person cannot be my disciple.” Relationship with Jesus comes first, above all. Ministry Can a woman who has divorced her adulterous or unbelieving, unrepentant spouse be involved in ministry? The headline on an online news report made me see red: “Demands Escalate for Lysa Terkeurst to Step Down After Divorce Announcement.” Terkeurst, who is the founder of the women’s ministry Proverbs 31 Ministries, encourages women all over the world to lead lives worthy of the calling of Christ, to align themselves with the womanly example found in Proverbs 31. The lead paragraph shares more information: “Some media outlets believe Lysa Terkeurst, the founder of women's ministry Proverbs 31 Ministries, should step down after announcing the end of her marriage,” wrote charismanews.com. Maybe the first question should be – can a woman be involved in ministry? “Some media outlets” need to read their Bibles. Luke 8:1-3 details the testimonies of three different women: “After this, Jesus traveled about from one town and village to another, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom of God. The Twelve were with him, and also some women who had been cured of evil spirits and diseases: Mary (called Magdalene) from whom seven demons had come out; Joanna the wife of Chuza, the manager of Herod’s household; Susanna; and many others. These women were helping to support them out of their own means.” Mary Magdalene had been cured by Jesus of seven demons. Seven! Joanna was the manager of Herod’s household – Herod, the ruthless ruler of Galilee who killed people arbitrarily. Susanna, who is only named in this passage without fanfare or description. But all three are honored here by Scripture stating they were helping to support Jesus and the disciples out of their own means. Priscilla and her husband Aquila were missionary partners with Paul, who he mentioned several times in his books. In Acts 16:7, Paul wrote, “Greet Andronicus and Junia, my fellow Jews who have been in prison with me. They are outstanding among the apostles, and they were in Christ before I was.” Junia – the only female apostle named in Scripture. Paul wrote to Timothy, “I am reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also,” [2 Timothy 1:15]. If it weren’t for Lois and Eunice, Timothy would not have been a steady companion on Paul’s missionary journeys, eventually starting the amazing church at Ephesus. Can women who have experienced divorce be in ministry? Women who are believers who have gone through the pain, embarrassment and uncertainty of divorce have an opportunity before them. Because they understand the shame of divorce, they can better minister to other women who are going through it. I remember sharing my story to a woman who had divorced her alcoholic husband who regularly beat her. She felt shame, and wondered how God could forgive her. I shared with her what God did in my life; Christ used my story to reach her. As we bowed our heads and I led her in the prayer of salvation, I thought that, right then, Christ redeemed my story. Jesus can make any test into a testimony and any mess – even the mess of divorce – into a message. 2 Corinthians 1:3-7 states, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.” We are to encourage one another! We are to comfort one another! We are to use life’s curveballs and the nastiness that exists in life, like divorce, to extend God’s grace to people. If we think God cannot forgive and use divorce, then we have no business thinking God can forgive or use anything. God can use anything to bring glory to Himself. Even divorce. In John 4, Jesus walks all the way to Samaria to a town called Sychar. The Samarians had nothing to do with Jewish people and the feeling was mutual. Jesus, being thirsty, decided to sit on the side of the well at the time of the day when no one would be filling their water jugs. Suddenly, a woman came – strange, when no one else was gathering water from the well. Jesus asked her for a drink of water. That opened the door for Him to talk with her about the Living Water only He can give. He then told her to go get her husband so he too could have the Living Water. “I have no husband,” she replied. Jesus said to her, “You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.” “Sir,” the woman said, “I can see that you are a prophet. Our ancestors worshiped on this mountain, but you Jews claim that the place where we must worship is in Jerusalem.” “Woman,” Jesus replied, “believe me, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jews. Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in the Spirit and in truth.” The woman said, “I know that Messiah” (called Christ) “is coming. When he comes, he will explain everything to us.” Then Jesus declared, “I, the one speaking to you — I am He.” [John 4:17-26] You think divorced women cannot make a difference in ministry? That five-time divorced woman who lived in Samaria experienced the Living Water. That little town called Sychar in Samaria is now known as the West Bank of Jerusalem, and according to the US State Department, has the highest concentration of Christians of all Israel. I like to think that a divorced woman, who experienced the opportunity of the grace of Jesus Christ, had something to do with that. Churches – and media outlets – today can learn something from this. When a woman who is in ministry makes the painful and personal decision to divorce her adulterous or abandoning husband, it is not a decision that is done lightly or without prayer. She needs the grace of God extended to her. God can use this to encourage others, spreading the Gospel and Christ’s encouragement far and wide to other women who need to know that there is no shame in Christ. No girl grows up thinking that one day she will be divorced. Toy companies don’t make “divorce dolls.” And no woman in ministry thinks that one day she will have to make that horrific decision to sign a divorce decree. But God can – and will – use this, for His glory, and for the saving of many souls. But we, as Christians, need to remember to extend the opportunity to grace to one another, in all situations. Peace, Terrie © 2017 Terrie McKee There's a black leather bench outside of the trauma intensive care unit in a Charlotte, NC hospital. During the night my husband was shot in the back and was screaming in pain while in his sterile TICU room, I would divide my time between his bed side and that bench, praying in both places. I'm sure I alarmed people who walked by that bench, as I was either sitting on it, crying and praying, or kneeling down before it, petitioning the Great Physician on bended knee -- for pain relief, for comfort, for wisdom. When I couldn't use words to pray, the Holy Spirit would take over. Psalm 56:8 says, "You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book." This doesn't mean God has literal bottles all over heaven with salty tears in them. It means He remembers. He hears and He sees. When we cannot go on speaking, when the tears fall without fail at every thought, He hears even those salty prayers. There are so many examples in Scripture of people praying when all seemed lost. David praying over his sick child who was conceived during his illicit affair with Bathsheba. Elisha's servant who accidentally dropped the borrowed ax-head in the water, afraid it was lost forever. Believers, holed up in a house, praying for Peter's deliverance, only to have Peter knock on the door. The girl who opened the door was so shocked to see him she slammed the door in his face in her excitement. But there's one instance in Scripture that stands out above all the rest. Among the olive trees, as His disciples couldn't keep their eyes opened even though He told them, "My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me," [Matthew 26:38], Jesus walked away from them and prayed. He didn't just pray, though. Matthew wrote that Jesus "bowed with his face to the ground, praying, “My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine," [Matthew 26:39]. Oh how hard that is! We want the test results to come back negative. We want our child to call us. We want our loved one to rise up out of that bed. I want to dance with my husband on the cruise we're going on. Yet, being in the center of God's will means doing the hard things. It means going back to the ICU room -- or the disciples -- and finding nothing has changed -- but still praying. He's still crying as nerve after nerve is shutting down and the disciples are still asleep. Still, we go back. We go back to bow on the ground and plead again. Not my will, Lord. You know the plans You have for us; plans to prosper us and not to harm us, plans to give us hope and a future. It may not be the future we intended. It may not be for us to understand these things. Yet, when we surrender ourselves to the will of God as followers of Jesus Christ, that means surrendering ourselves to His will -- not our's. Look at Matthew 26:44-46. "So He went to pray a third time, saying the same things again. Then He came to the disciples and said, “Go ahead and sleep. Have your rest. But look — the time has come. The Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. Up, let’s be going. Look, my betrayer is here!” When I read this while in the hospital with Greg, in the room with him as he was finally able to sleep, it's like God's hand came through the pages of the Bible and flicked my forehead. He was telling me to rest -- even as I felt like I had to be awake and doing something -- anything -- to have God hear my cries. He was telling me that while I need rest and sleep, He does not. He's got this. But when the time comes...when the time comes to be awake to declare the healing testimony of Jesus Christ... "Up, let's be going." Prayer changes into praise. Praise changes into testimony -- no matter what happens, no matter if Greg will walk either on earth or in heaven, God's praises we will sing and shout as He, and He alone, has the victory. Amen. Amen. In Christ Alone, Terrie (c) 2017 Terrie McKee Lately, I’ve been thinking about lost dreams. Not dreams as in the nocturnal musings of a mind at rest, but deep-seeded, rooted desires of one’s heart – and losing them. Growing up, my dad always talked about “the land.” A mythical place, he would talk about acreage like we were already living on it – we just needed to find it. Later, while digging into my genealogy, I discovered that my Irish ancestors, the MacQuillins, were forced off their land by King James. They never regained the “Lords of the Route” aristocratic status they had once held in the imposing Dunluce Castle. The dream about “the land” in my family is centuries old. When I was pregnant with my first son, I dreamt about him doing what boys do and growing up: graduating high school, college, falling in love, getting married, having a family. The diagnosis of autism and intellectually disabled, coupled with bipolar disorder, has effectively squashed those dreams for my oldest child. It is a painful thing indeed to have had hopes only to have them dashed, daily, by the onslaught of autism. Yes, I know, there are many people with autism who live full, productive lives. If you know anything about autism, it is this: if you’ve met one person with autism, you have met one person with autism. Each person is different, with various needs, disabilities, eccentricities, and triggers. Still, there is a distinct, tangible grief that comes with any child’s diagnosis. On mine and my husband’s first date, he asked me, “So…what are your hopes, dreams, and aspirations?” I thought it was the strangest question ever – but one totally in keeping with Greg’s character. He genuinely wanted to know – and what we discovered was that we had the same dreams. With eight years of marriage behind us, at Thanksgiving of 2015, we still shared those dreams: to one day own a farmhouse on land (there’s that land dream again), to grow our own food, to live in peace and quiet. We wanted to live out 1 Thessalonians 4:11 -- “…and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you…” My husband, who grew up on a hog farm in Ohio, and I shared this dream of leading a quiet, Godly life. A life in which we’d have dogs and barn cats and goats. A life in which our children would know what it felt like to run through waist-high hay fields and gaze up at starlit nights, unencumbered by the visual noise of streetlights. But sometimes, those dreams meet the sundown of a day’s end, and they are no more. Greg was shot and subsequently paralyzed in a random crime event right after Thanksgiving of 2015. Over the last 20 months we’ve dealt with many losses, not just the use of his legs. Knowing we can never take a non-accessible vacation again, or he cannot walk his girls down the aisle on their wedding days. The Lord has blessed us with some successes and a few realized dreams. Because of an ingenious device called a UFloat, which is like an upside-down life jacket, Greg has realized the dream of being able to get in a swimming pool and doggie-paddle around. It’s the closest thing to standing he can do. We acquired a standing frame, but the first time he used it, the handle broke and hydraulic fluid leaked all over the floor. But the UFloat has allowed him to get in water and move, on his own, without the wheelchair. Praise Jesus. Perhaps the hardest dream of all to let go, for me, is the dream of the farmhouse with the rocking-chair front porch, the big country kitchen, hearing roosters bearing testimony to the break of day. It is hard to let go of a dream shared with the love of your life. I am so very grateful for the house that was made handicapped accessible for him, and am beyond thankful for the people that made it possible. I believe, though, that God is working even in the sundown of dreams. Even now He is giving us different hopes, dreams and aspirations. Perhaps one day He will bless us with the fulfillment of the farm; perhaps He has other plans for us. The thing is this: God’s plans for us are so much bigger than our dreams. His plans, holy and perfect, may lead us down paths that end, then He walks us through the woods until He reveals a new path. Right now, it does feel like we’re in the woods, trying to find the way – but I am so thankful that God is leading us through this time, drawing us closer to Him, and to each other. To God be the glory. Peace in Him, Terrie © 2017 Terrie McKee |
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